Who I will NOT be Voting For

Ok, this is probably the most heated topic that I will take up simply because I honestly hate discussing politics. The subject it stymied with far too many influences of subjects that can be misconstrued in an effort to swing the appeal of the candidate in the direction of one group or another. The problem is that many of the candidates have speech writers that will twist the words that they use to make them very generic and yet seem as though they are a positive statement to the crowd they are trying to reach. If the words aren’t generic then the candidate is instantly caught flip-flopping (see John Kerry for a good example of this).
Over the years the words “Blame Bush” have become synonymous with everything that is spiraling downward in the USA. Of course those that are currently crying “I blame Bush” used to say “I blame Bush and Congress” and now that the congress has been “Democratic” (there is no democracy in our current government everyone is in it for themselves and in my humble opinion they should all fined 500K for every year they have held office for misrepresentation to the public) they feel that Congress is doing a bang up job, and that its obviously the president that is this countries puppet master… as Bobcat Goldthwait once said, “Blaming the president for the problems of the country is like blaming Ronald McDonald whenever I get bad hamburger.”

Ok now that I have gotten that out, let me tell you who I will not be voting for:

Barack Obama

I will not be voting for this fool for the following reasons:

1) He is a flip-flopper.
a) The Wrong Button Excuse:
1a) In 1997 he voted against the election reform bill and then claimed he pushed the wrong button.
2a) In 2000 he voted for a ban on human cloning and then claimed he pushed the wrong button.
3a) In 2000 he voted for a gambling measure that was opposed by church groups, and then claimed he pushed the wrong button.
4a) In 2002 he voted to defund a social service office in Chicago and then claimed he pushed the wrong button.

b) Caught Lying to the Public:
1b) Claimed to be anti-war before becoming a Senator, and yet once he was admitted to the Senate he voted to extend the war more than 5 times.
2b) Claimed in a speech given before a Jewish Audience that his Uncle helped “Liberate Auschwitz”, which is amazing considering Auschwitz was liberated by the Soviets not the Americans or the Kenyans.
3b) Claimed the church he was part of (which he has since denounced and abandoned) never propagated Anti-American or Anti-White speeches. Upon reading his autobiography he apparently did hear both of these kinds of speeches at his church, he finally admitted to this once put under journalistic pressure.

2) He lacks both Judgment and Character
a) Pledged to dismantle our national defense system, including development of future defense technologies.
b) Has said that he believes that sex-ed is appropriate for kindergarteners to learn.
c) Pledged to sit down with state sponsors of terrorism without preconditions in his first year as president.
d) Refuses to have anything to do with our countries flag including wearing a pin of the flag, or standing before it hand over heart during the pledge of allegiance (He usually puts his hands behind his back, and looks to the ground during this time).
e) He is promoting open boarders and no capital punishment.
f) While he claims he is in favor of racial equality, he also is in favor of the Congress forming a “Black Caucus”.
g) While is said he is for pulling out the troops in Iraq (and later in his televised campaign promotions says that he wants to dictate troop levels), he has also threatened to “Bomb Pakistan” without government authorization. If you were unaware, Pakistan is one of our allies.

3) The company he keeps:
a) Tony Rezko – A convicted criminal, indicted on charges of wire fraud, money laundering, bribery, attempted extortion, mail fraud and corrupt solicitation.
b) Bill Ayers – Convicted terrorist and a murderer.
c) Alexi Giannoulias – Obama helped Alexi become the Illinois State Treasurer, Alexi took mortgages and gave the funding to Michael Giorango (a noted crime boss) who in turn purchased a Casino with the funding.
d) Jim Johnson & Penny Pritzker – Two people that somehow made out huge on all the of the subprime mortgage losses that have occurred in the last couple years. Johnson being a former CEO of Fannie Mae (and made out huge with Country Wide Loans) and Pritzker being a former Co-Owner of Superior Bank FSB ( a bank that made loans to people with less than superior credit). When Superior folded, Auditors Ernst & Young covered the FDIC loss of 40 Million, while Pritzker and her family made off with 2 Billion in the bank’s assets.

As you can see based on just the few facts that I have posted here, Obama is definitely not someone we as intelligent citizens should be putting our faith behind. I cannot see any kind of bright future behind someone that wants to disarm the country, host sit downs with terrorists and anti-American dictators, and will most likely steer us into a position of destruction.

Of course now you are thinking oh so he’s not going to vote Obama, so that means that he must be voting for McCain… WRONG.



John McCain

I will not be voting for this old man because:

1) McCain is pro open borders
a) He has voted in favor not only of completely opening the borders of the country but to instantly process and allow 15million illegal immigrants immediately become citizens. (I am not against foreigners becoming citizens of the USA, after all trace every persons heritage in this country and you will find that less than 1% have no foreign blood, I simply don’t believe that someone entering the country for the first time that is 70 years old should be able to walk into the nearest city hall and be able to receive Social Security without ever having paid a penny into it.)
b) He voted against the statement that would have made English the official language of the USA. (Yes, I want to learn Spanish, I currently live in Florida and it would help me to have a basic understanding of it, but I should learn it because I want to learn it, I don’t believe that Americans should be forced to learn it because a politician wants a larger stem of voters that choose not to learn to speak English.)

2) He is out of touch with the younger generations
a) At 73 years old how could this man possibly have anything in common with those of us that are coming into our own at 30? I mean sure he was our age once but that was back in 1965 and as far as I can tell there is a slight… slight… change in the times since then. He is known for being quick to act on anger and impulse, how many people 18 – 30 do you think he force into battle should someone insult him?
b) The policies that he is suggesting will not affect those that are his age, they will not effect the Baby Boomers for very long either, considering the first wave of Boomers are on their way into retirement now, and it is now our legacy to support them through retirement he will be long gone from this mortal coil once we see the effect of having to support our parents and the foreigners that decide to live off the American dole. (As it currently stands we have already been told as a generation that once the majority of the Baby Boomers are on Social Security there will be no SS for our generation… guess what that means, if we don’t pack away all of our money now there will be no such word as retirement.. we will work ourselves into the grave, and at the rate that businesses are dropping the pay of their workers in relation to the rising costs of everything ,we will all be working 2 full time jobs just to make ends meet without having a penny to save). His plan is to raise the retirement age and cut back on Social Security (as I mentioned, we won’t get to retire, and there will be no money left).

3) He is unable to remain loyal to his constituents
a) Has sided with “liberals” on most ideas although he remains that he is a “Republican”.
b) He seems too unsure of himself and when he lacks direction he turns to the Kennedy’s , Lieberman’s, and the Feingold’s not as a last resort but as his first.

4) Is collecting disability even though he certainly doesn’t need it (He is currently collecting $58,000 a year in disability. There are many people, myself included, that don’t make that much and we work more than 40 – 50 hours a week (he doesn’t even work half of that). I just can’t trust someone that will collect on this when the man has millions in the bank already.

5) He is in favor of prayer in Public Schools. (I am always in favor of separation of church and state). He is also a supporter of “Intelligent Design” which for those of you who don’t know is being in favor of teaching Creationism in public schools as opposed to teaching evolution.

Well my list of McCain is not as poignant as Obama’s but I can tell you that I have no desire to vote for either of these people. It is impossible to think that as Americans we cannot come up with a better group of people to push for Presidency. The worst part about it is that we are not the ones deciding who should run, we are simply told “Here are your choices”, and those choices come from rich elitists that decide upon a couple of puppets that will do exactly what they say. So we get a small group of people that are completely worthless when it comes to the election and suddenly we now (as Lewis Black put it) have a choice between two bowls of shit whose only difference is the smell.

Well this is it folks… there is no more… I won’t be voting for either of these people this year. In fact if I decide to use my write in I’ll vote for my dad to be president.

Jim Fulton

Why I WILL vote for him to be president:

1) The man has strong convictions and he sticks with them. I stand behind the fact that when he has made a decision he will stick with it and he doesn’t flip-flop to appease those that his decision does not effect.

2) I can safely assure you that hasn’t taken even a penny from a single big oil investor. He also has no ties whatsoever with anyone in the Middle East!

3) He puts in over 40 hours a week at his job. He rarely takes time off, unless he has something special planned for his family you will usually find him doing something for one of his many jobs.

4) He is up to date on the plights of the younger generation, he has heard not only myself, but my sister and brother bitch consistently about how difficult it is to get on your feet these days. He knows that we are not the only ones out there struggling to survive, and he listens when we have something to say.

5) He can be intimidating. He doesn’t have the McCain angry scowl, but he does have what I call “the collective calm” that appears when someone is doing something he doesn’t quite approve of, he’ll let you go and make an ass of yourself without really responding. He pays close attention to what you are doing, and (for the most part unless you are really doing something god awful) he will let you go about your business, and once you have finished making an ass of yourself, it is at that point when you are all worn out from stupidity that he prepares to strike.

6) He will keep trades with foreign countries peaceful, while he buys many things that are made and produced right here in America, he’ll be the first to allow Japan to ship all of it used Honda’s Accura’s, Toyota’s, and Nissan’s into the country (as long as he gets first pick of the lot) to sell at reasonable pricing.

7) He’ll not only lock the boarders down, but those that have been deported will suddenly fall under the “Fulton Household Living Rule” which includes you are allowed to stay in the house until you have moved out or been kicked out, after which you are only allowed to return for visitation, you will be closely watched, and any sign that shows that you may be trying to move back in you are kicked for good. (Not that he would permanently kick his kids out of his life, but I am living proof that he will be damned before I’m allowed to move back in now that I’m out hahah).

8) Those that are on death row will not be allowed to grow old and die. You think Texas has been quick to pull the trigger on death row inmates, that’s nothing. If you are convicted of a serious crime that warrants death as the punishment… you might as well kiss your ass goodbye once my dad is president. Our prisons won’t even need a “row” for death row. Hell they may only need one or two cells.

9) Hugh Heffner’s birthday will be celebrated right along with Martin Luther King’s. Martin Luther King helped bring equality to the black community, and Hugh Heffner helped bring Playboy Bunnies to the world. These men have done some amazing things for our lives.
10) The national deficit will finally get balanced. Cash only everything! If there is no such thing as credit then you won’t have to worry about accruing a deficit. If you don’t have the money to pay for it… guess what? YOU CAN’T BUY IT! Ta-da! Crisis averted and the USA once more becomes a hell of a lot stronger as it no longer owes itself money.

So, on this Election Day skip over those that are in it for themselves, and their domestic and foreign friends. Vote my dad for President!

18+13

Yeah here it is, my 18 + 13 birthday*. Looks like I am getting a little wiser. Today I am at work (we’ll see how long that lasts, I have a meeting at 2pm to attend, and I’m probably going to take off shortly afterwards). Being that things have been all over the place in terms of getting my life reorganized (trying to get a new job, and getting back to some kind of mental comfort zone… comfort is achieved when I feel that I don’t have to stress over little things.) I am looking at this year as being a pivotal point and I am going to have to make some very important decisions.

Thanks to everyone that is sending me happy birthday comments, and I’ll be talking with all of you soon!

*I am reminded by my friend Keith that once you pass 29 you change the counting structure to cover the age that you feel plus the age that you act I feel 18 and I act 13… therefore I am going to get to be 18 for the next 17 years, and by then I’m sure I’ll find another factor to add into the equation.

The Beginning....

The Beginning….

My world is built around me in a cosmos of circuits, cables, power supplies and monitors. This is where I have been for many years. A geek? Yeah… most would probably call me that. The funny thing is that there are a lot of people that don’t even know where that name comes from… they just remember people in school who seemed to understand electronics and proved that they could be quite good at complex things being called “Geek”. The term actually comes from long before computers were readily available to anyone (roughly 1876, and it was referring to a carnival “freak” who would open the side show attractions usually by catching a live chicken in front of the audience, biting its head off, and swallowing it… no I’m not that kind of geek.)

Anyway, here I am after 4 years in Florida, trying to figure things out. My mind is somewhat mushed. How do you look at your life and try to compile all you have done into a few pages just to impress someone that more than likely doesn’t know the first thing about what you understand?

Let me simplify…

July 9^th 2008 there was a meeting. I was told a week earlier that I had to attend. No matter what I had to be there even if it meant that I would have to call the company and have them put me on speakerphone just so I could be in attendance… that wasn’t necessary.

At 9:30am I entered the conference room as I had many times before, only to see that the room had been arranged as though this meeting was going to be a presentation of sorts. Within 10 minutes the management meeting began. The president of the company stood before us, leaning against the wall that we were facing and the first words out of his mouth, “Welcome to the meeting… How should I begin? I guess I should say this is where I make my money….”

As you can imagine the meeting was not what we wanted to experience. Our location was being shut down in 60 days. We were told that the company had been doing well in late 2006, for the first time in years it was in the black and it was finally starting to profit. Then the company decided that it wanted to have its own accounts. They didn’t want to be a company that maintains other companies accounts… they wanted to see their profits increase as any company would, so they took out a loan and bought up a number of accounts that they would now own.

Over the next year the company would screw up these accounts so badly that they would ask us to bail them out. The screwed up the billing, they screwed up the sales, they screwed up the installation, and they made a lot of people angry. How did we bail them out? They would dump the billing calls onto our operators and ask them to make phone calls to the customers and ask them to make a payment over the phone… or inform them that the company made a mistake and did not bill them for 4 months and now those months have accrued and we want the money. They also turned some people into an answering service to respond to those that people that were calling up screaming about an alarm system that was supposed to be installed and the techs ripped up their ceilings and walls, never finished the job and haven’t been back in days. Or the occasional call we would get from an apartment owner that would ask who the hell we think we are installing an alarm system in an apartment that was being rented, without asking the owner of the apartment if they wanted or would allow an alarm system to be installed? So yeah, they weren’t the ones that took the brunt and most harsh attacks from these people, we did… and then once we diffused them we would send the complacent person on to the main office to handle someone that is now more calm and ready to listen or talk. They thanked us for it too… did they compensate us? Hell no… but we did get a “thanks”.

Now here we are half way through 2008 and we have just been told that because of the mistakes that they made, our facility is being closed. The company decided that they would remove the core business and to keep their investors happy they would focus on nothing but the accounts they bought.

Apparently some people just don’t learn.

Why is it a mistake to do what they are doing? Look at the company Sunbeam. Most people have heard of it but there are many people that could never tell you what they do. Sunbeam was a company that began making home appliances in 1910. The company survived through the depression, and continued right through over the years until the 1990’s when it began to see some serious decline in its business. In 1996 the company hired a man name Albert Dunlap to become the companies CEO. Over the next year he became known as “Chainsaw Al”. The nickname came from his management style… in the first year he fired most of the management and hired all new management. He sold or closed 2/3 of the 18 plants that Sunbeam owned, and he fired 6000 employees. He ruthlessly went through the company as a chainsaw would cut through lumber. His rules of running a successful business were:

Get the right management team
Know your business
Pinch Pennies
Get a real strategy

These concepts were all well and good except for the fact that he was unsure how to rebuild what he destroyed properly? A company that had been around longer than he had been alive was not going to come back fresh when you kill new technologies, terminate your core competencies, and then spend money that hasn’t come in yet. To cover for his efforts of ripping apart the company by the seams he bought up 3 brands to add to the Sunbeam name, Coleman Camping Gear, First Alert Smoke Alarms, & Mr. Coffee Signature brands.

It would 2 years later than the Sunbeam board of directors would fire Dunlap. It took 2 years for the board to see that his actions would sink the company. It would be in 2001 that because of Dunlaps actions the company would file for bankruptcy protections, and it wouldn’t be until 2002 that Sunbeam would come out of bankruptcy only to have to change its tarnished name to American Household Inc.

Anyone that knows business strategy would know that you don’t kill the core of your business and expect to come out clean.

What could have been learned by Chainsaw Al’s mistakes?

Cutting costs isn’t impossible, anyone can do it, but there are better ways than to hack & slash jobs
Both New & Old Employees matter
Motivation is extremely important
Keep those around that know your business & product
Trade relations are extremely important
Don’t believe what you read from management books!

So here we are in 2008, the president of the company I work for is closing the facility that handles the majority of its business. They are selling off all of the liquid assets and doing god knows what with its hard assets. To be honest, because there is no board of directors to take the reigns back and make this company powerful again, I give the home office a year or less before it collapses.

But Ryan, why would you have such a grim outlook on the future of the remaining portion of the company? Honestly based upon what I have seen in the last 4 years I have come to discover that when your head office is lead by a ship of fools then running aground is inevitable. Need proof? Here are a few things that I found out about the company that give me such strong beliefs....

1) The CEO of the company does not live in the same state as the home office (He flys to the office every week stays in a hotel, rents a car, and then flies home a few days later.)
2) The person in charge of Telephony in the home office spent over $300,000 on a telephone system for our location that DOES NOT work with the most vital component of the business. He bought it because of its popularity, and it seems to be preprogrammed for Hotels but not for security monitoring. The system still does not work and cannot be returned... he still has his job.
3) They still have billing problems with their customers.
4) They are still having people go door to door to sell alarm systems... this means more irate customers and no front line to diffuse their anger.
5)They have no core business to pick them up and a major debt that they can't possibly repay any time soon.

So here I am… back to the beginning….

After giving 4 years to a company and pushing to do everything I can to improve it… and if you saw the condition of everything when I first started you will know that everything has improved.

Now I am in a unique position… I still have a couple weeks in which I will get a paycheck, I have revamped my resume and I have been distributing it in every direction. I have even been setting up interviews (I gotta say I am sick of hearing from recruiters though…. They are paid to get me in the door, the only issue is they don’t always know how to work it out so I get the benefits or the salary I need to survive).

I am also in a unique position because my lease on my apartment is up this coming month. So I have to figure out what I am going to do. If I fight hard enough I will find a job in the area and I get to keep the apartment that I really like. It’s in a great area, the price is right, and I have no problems with any part of it. The only thing that seems to be killing me is the fact that I am really getting sick of Florida. Yeah it’s a pretty place, it’s nice to visit, but I gotta say it can really get on your nerves after a while.

I feel a little better in the respect that I have been hearing back from various companies now that are interested in having me interview. It means that I have enough knowledge and skill to represent myself in a professional way, and that they see that I am not some inexperienced kid that hasn’t cut his teeth yet and is trying to make a name for himself.

The strangest thing is that when I was first told that the facility was going to be closed within a couple days I got sick. Suddenly got this violent strain of some kind of virus which I believe was strep throat. The symptoms were all there and it felt like things did when I was a kid (and I got strep all the time as a kid). So I finally recover after a week… I go through everything including losing my voice for 5 days. Now that I am supposed to be better I don’t know why the sickness hasn’t quite stopped. It’s been a couple weeks and I still haven’t fully recovered yet. I know I haven’t….. I’m doing everything I can but I still have this sickly sweet smell that fills my sinuses so I can smell it when I breathe… it happens every time I get sick and until I recoup 100% it doesn’t go away. Then again neither does the dizzy spells, or the coughing fits, or the feeling that sudden desire to worship the porcelain god…. While I haven’t gotten that far the feeling sits on me for hours at a time before I go to bed.

Yeah life can be a funny thing… its said that it is the only game that no one wins. It is the only thing that anyone can’t accurately explain. Life is like a business, a select few control it, there are some that are rich, many that are not, and some that just choose not to do anything and yet they are still around. It’s one of those few things that will give you the illusion of being ahead of the game momentarily before dragging you behind the 8 ball without so much as a moment’s notice. Don’t believe me? Ever spent a number of months saving every penny you could just so you could afford something special? Perhaps you may have sacrificed a number of things that normally bring you happiness just so you could have one thing that was truly special. So you saved, and you scrimped and you managed to put enough money aside so that on the next paycheck you could afford what you have been waiting for… suddenly your car has a major problem , or you get a ticket, or god forbid someone in your family is suddenly on their death bed and you need to fly home to see them… (I use these examples because in the last 4 years I have had all of them happen to me, not that it doesn’t happen every day or that I am some kind of unique case because I know I’m not.. but these are all examples of how one minute you are ahead and the next minute you are caught in the undertow of life).

Well… you’ve made it… my long winded schpeel is over. Am I a better person for it, no, not really. Do I feel as though I have accomplished something? Well aside from giving me a chance to spill a variety of topics onto electronic paper I don’t think I’ve changed anything. My mind is just as much a mush as it was when I started… I’ve applied for a few more jobs and I’ve heard back from a few more places… asking me when I will be in the area for an interview… damn recruiters…

I think if given the right amount of time I could figure things out…

Precious Snowflake Syndrome

The tail end of a generation. We have had a lot of labels, most of us are familiar with the moniker "Generation X". I can say that I include myself in the tail end of that generation. It is the one that came directly after the "Baby Boomer" generation. The few years after I began growing up there was another generation... it is one that has no defined moniker... it is a "morphing" generation that we have heard referred to as "The TV generation", "The MTV generation", "The Pepsi generation", "Generation next", and a dozen other names that are there to tie in a current pop culture trend to the kids that are growing up from the early 80's.
It was within this new generation that things began to change. The 80's, the age in which style was disgusting, yuppies were making millions on the people that were spending as frivolously as possible, and perspective was something that no one could seem to find. The issue was that in this time when drugs were rampant in the highest paying jobs, children were accessories, and kids were being given names that were supposed to be styled and tailored for success: "Taylor", "Dakota", "Tyler", and a thousand other non-conformist names were designed to make these kids instant celebrities.
These kids were raised to act like their parents were acting. They were not raised on Lego's they were raised to be demanding and influential, and because of which now we are getting the ultimate backwash. The "influential" kids began acting as adults far too soon, never being reprimanded when they did wrong, and threatening to take adults to court if they didn't get their way.
I can remember being 13 years old in the early 90's and hearing about kids that were taking their parents to court for various reasons. These thoughts all came flooding back when I read on June 18th that a 12 year old girl in Ottawa Canada took her father to court for grounding her. He had decided that there were some online chat sites that he did not feel it was appropriate for her to be accessing. He put a block on those internet sites preventing her from accessing them from home. Later he apparently found that she had accessed those sites from a friends house and posted pictures of herself online that he considered to be somewhat risque. For disobeying him the punishment he imposed was to ground her for 3 days, she was also prevented from going on a school field trip, and he took away her internet access.
She in turn took him to court, and SUCCESSFULLY sued him. Judge Suzanne Tessier decided that the punishment was too severe and she ruled in favor of the child.
On June 19 Bill S-209 was approved by the Canadian senate and it headed to the house of commons. What is Bill S-209 you might ask? It is the "anti-spanking" bill. Yes, you read correctly, the Senate has passed a bill which may very well become Canadian law which will prevent any person of authority including parents from spanking their children.

Over the years I have watch things head in this direction, and I have done very little about it. In fact I looked with disdain at people that would allow their children to get away with things. When I grew up I remember being spanked when I would do something I wasn't supposed to do and it kept me on a straight and narrow path. I remember spending many afternoons being told that I was not allowed to leave my room... these days that is no longer a punishment.
Why was it a punishment when I was a kid? That's easy, I didn't have anything in my room other than books a few generic toys and an old turntable. When I was being punished I didn't have any of the entertainment items that we see littering children's rooms these days. If you were in your room for 2 - 3 hours it was boring, you didn't have video games and your own television, you certainly didn't have your own phone, but now a-days things are different. Parents put all of the entertainment in the children's room and they have no way of effectively telling the child "NO!"
I remember having a neighbor who was at the beginning of the next generation. I remember his mother reprimanding him. She even reprimanded me once.... it was the easiest punishment I have ever experienced. I don't really remember what I did, I probably swore and she told me that I was going to be punished and that I would remain in "Time Out" until I was sorry. She put me in the corner of a room and told me to stand there until I felt sorry. I think I must have freaked her out because I was so used to remaining in my room for 2 hours or more that I just stood there, and I didn't move. He son would stand there for 20 seconds - 1 minute and then say "I feel sorry" and she would tell him that he could go. I must have been standing there for almost 10 minutes and she got worried that I hadn't "felt sorry yet". I didn't understand that she wanted me to tell her when I felt sorry. When you are in your own room with nothing to do for 3 hours then you know what it is like to feel sorry. When you are standing in a corner for 10 minutes when you have a friend that is waiting in the same room for you to play then its not exactly a learning or growth experience.
Having experienced the stupidity of the "time out" I realized why my friend had no fear in acting out whenever he wanted because he would only have to say "I'm sorry" after 30 seconds of standing in a corner and all was back to normal. Now when I am out in public and I see a child telling his/her parents off I realize that these are the children of the "time out generation". These kids would have no idea what to do if they had someone bigger than them grab them by one arm and open hand smack them repeatedly on the ass before being put alone in a room without entertainment or outside communication. The kid would most likely start planning to contact their lawyer as soon as they got their cell phone back.
Back in 2002 I did have one experience that I will not soon forget. I was working at a place that I will refer to as the "Blue and Yellow hell" and I had been in the middle of one of the worst weeks. The Christmas rush was over and now people were in "return and repurchase mode". This is when they return the gifts they were given, they get a gift certificate, and then they wait a day and repurchase their gift as an "open box" item thus getting the gift back and keeping the difference of the gift certificate. There was a man that was in the store and he was upset over the fact that all the cheapest computers were sold out and they would most likely not be replaced for a few months. He began swearing up a storm. I told him that since there were children in the store if he did not stop the foul language I would have him removed from the store. He then "dared me to fucking do so", I had 3 of the biggest guys in the store aid me in escorting him from the building along with the assistance of an officer that was in building at the time.
I felt justified in my actions and proceeded to go through the rest of the day as I normally would. It was the next day that I had to do the same thing. This time it wasn't a full grown adult that I tossed from the store but a child and his mother. I was working on trying to keep the department running smooth when I suddenly heard, "NO! I FUCKING WANT THIS GAME! FUCK YOU! I WANT IT!" I quickly made my way to the isle where I saw a little kid that couldn't have been more than 7 years old clutching an XBOX game in his hands and the mother who was looking completely disinterested in her child as he continued to drop the f-bomb over and over again at her. I approached first trying to be passive by asking if there is anything I can help her with, and the lady said "No I'm just browsing". The child on the other hand continued to scream. I allowed this to go on for about 20 more seconds before I approached the woman again and this time I said "Ma'am I am going to have to ask you to control your child. This is a family store, and your child is screaming obsenaties at the top of his lungs. If you cannot control your child I will be required to have your removed from the store." She looked at me as though I had 9 heads and said something to the effect of "He is his own person and I will not stunt his personal growth". It was then that I had the 3 biggest guys in the store assist me with the help of another officer that was in the store in removing the woman and her precious snowflake. Being that the store was in tax free NH and there were a lot of out of stater's that would drive there we had a lot of officers that would frequent it to make sure that things were ok.

I believe that now is the time to shut down on the "precious snowflake" perspective. We need to take away the notion that children need to express themselves however they like. We need to take away the idea that children are smart enough to know what is good for them and that they will learn the most from their own mistakes. If we don't teach them that what they have done is a mistake then how are they going to make that decision? We now have a generation of children that are greedy, immoral, and lacking the basic ethics that we were taught when we were kids. Just because your parents may have assisted in screwing up your life doesn't mean you have to pass those ideals on to then next wave of miscreants. As a society we need to reform the way we view children, we need to teach them that they can't have everything they ever wanted just because they exist, we need to tell them that they need to know what it is to truly earn a reward. There is no such thing as entitlement and if they think that we are going to just give them everything they want simply because they say "I want it!" they are wrong!

Eventually I will have children, it will be a huge change in my life, but the one thing that I will not do is put them in a position of power especially since I have been fighting to get even the slightest bit of control my whole life, and when I fight and succeed it puts me in a position where I feel as though I have truly accomplished something and that I have earned what I receive.

I'll leave this blog with a quote from the late great George Carlin. This was his take on children from his standup special "You're all Diseased":
" Something else I'm getting tired of in this country is all this stupid bullshit I have to listen to about children. That's all you hear about anymore, children: "Help the children, save the children, protect the children." You know what I say? Fuck the children!

They're getting entirely too much attention. And I know what some of you are thinking: " Jesus, he's not going to attack children, is he?" Yes he is! He's going to attack children. And remember, this is Mr. Conductor talking; I know what I'm talking about.

And I also know that all you boring single dads and working moms, who think you're such fucking heroes, aren't gonna like this, but somebody's gotta tell you for your own good: your children are overrated and overvalued, and you've turned them into little cult objects. You have a child fetish, and it's not healthy. And don't give me all that weak shit, "Well, I love my children." Fuck you! Everybody loves their children; it doesn't make you special.... John Wayne Gacy loved his children. Yes, he did. He kept them right out in the yard near the garage! That's not what I'm talking about. What I'm talking about is this constant, mindless yammering in the media, this neurotic fixation that suggests that somehow everything--everything--has to revolve around the lives of children. It's completely out of balance.

Listen, there are a couple of things about kids you have to remember. First of all, they're not all cute. In fact, if you look at 'em real close, most of them are rather unpleasant looking. And a lot of them don't smell too good either. The little ones in particular seem to have a kind of urine and
sour-milk combination that I don't care for at all. Stay with me on this folks, the sooner you face it the better off your going to be.

Second, premise: not all children are smart and clever. Got that? Kids are like any other group of people: a few winners, a whole lot of losers! This country is filled with loser kids who simply...aren't...going anywhere! And there's nothing you can do about it, folks. Nothing! You can't save them all. You can't do it. You gotta let 'em go; you gotta cut 'em loose; you gotta stop over-protecting them, because your making 'em too soft." - George Carlin

The End of an Era

This morning I woke up the usual way as I normally would. Started my regular routine, and grabbed a book that I have been reading called "My boring ass life" by Kevin Smith. Essentially the book is a diary of his life during the time that he was preparing and eventually working on the film Clerks 2.
He began to talk about another movie that he was in called Catch and Release, and how it was appropriate for him to be part of the movie because it was very much in line with the style of his movie "Jersey Girl". It was at this time that I started thinking about Jersey Girl and how it was not as bad as many people have deemed it to be, the saving grace of the film being that he got some people to act for him that made the movie what it was... one of those people being George Carlin.
I began thinking about how Carlin had done some amazing things over the years and how his brand of humor has been one truly reflecting the best points as well as the most asinine ideals that we maintain as a culture.
In fact it was only about 3 weeks ago that I dug out his book "Brain Droppings" and I presented it to my girlfriend to read. She knew about Carlin, but from what I know never really followed a whole lot of his work. I told her that since she and I think along the same level, she would probably really get a kick out his book, and his perspective.
This morning I also had one other thought.... this is odd for me to understand because I have had this thought many times before over other well known celebrities... the thought was "Man, things are gonna really suck when Carlin goes, the world is going to lose an amazing person, a brilliant mind, and what could be conceived to be a modern day philosopher." It was roughly 40 minutes later that I learned that George Carlin died last night at roughly 6pm PDT, (9 pm EST).
While 71 seems like he lived a long life, the average lifespan these days is about 78 - 79 which means to me that he died younger than he should have.
His life was exceptional in the idea that he was one of the few people that experienced things from multiple perspectives but did not allow the worst of things to take him down. Over the years he was an admitted drug and drink addict. It took a number of years for him to work his way past that but once he did he remained clean and sober. He could speak clearly on the subjects that many people haven't experienced first hand and offer a clear perspective of what things are like in layman's terms. He also did this successfully by being descriptively funny. He liked to point out things that people knew existed, but make sure that it came about in a way that it really made them think about what others were actually saying.
Over the years his observations became less playfully observant and more of an attack. His material became more abrasive and brash as it dug into issues that no one wanted to have thrown at them. Even up to the point where after 9/11/01 Carlin prepared for his latest HBO special and ultimately had about 25 minutes of it cut out because the execs thought that he went after the 9/11 subject too abruptly at a time when people might take serious offense to his opinion.
Carlin wasn't what one would call a man of few words, for words were his weapon of choice and he wielded them as only a master could. If you haven't had the chance I would highly recommend finding as many of his albums as possible and seeing the progression of his comedy. Also read his books, he wrote 3 best sellers which can now be bought in one paperback collection. While he may no longer be with us, his obscure thoughts and poignant observations will always remain strong.

It is with a sense of loss that I write this, a final farewell to one of Americas most amazing minds, it was truly a pleasure to bare witness to the brilliance that was Mr. Carlin. While there may be many others that follow in his footsteps there will never be another one quite like him.

-Ryan Fulton

Jason Fulton December 27, 1972 ~ June 9, 2008

This blog is written in memoriam of my cousin.
To those of you who live in New England you probably heard last week in the news about a man in Lempster NH who was reported as to have jumped off of a the Brattleboro bridge in Vermont. The reason it made such news is because the man in Lempster was reported as being the man that jumped… he shared the same name as an optometrist in Claremont New Hampshire one town over. The name the two man share being Jason Fulton, both age 35.

Jason Fulton of Claremont is my cousin.

I write this as my way of coping with the situation. I don't exactly know how I should respond. I can say that my mind and my heart have both been screaming in anguish since I was told. They both are screaming for very different reasons. My heart screams because he was a very caring person. We shared many experiences together. He was the first grandchild on my father's side of my family, he was the first of the grand children to get married, he was the first to have a child. He was also technically the most successful of us all in getting his degree in Optometry. He was also well on his way to having his own practice.

I have so many reasons to look up to him and so many reasons to believe that he was a great person. When I would go to Loon Mountain as a kid he was the one that I spent most of my time with because he was only slightly older than me and I could easily identify with him. Loon Mountain was the one place other than my grandmother's house that I associate with Jason. As kids we would go on the occasional hike in the mountains, we would race to the top of "The big rock" behind the timeshare home. We would spend time in the arcade or at the pool just hanging out and having fun.

Every moment I think of my heart screams louder realizing that there will never be another time in which we will get together, and while I have never had the chance to meet his wife or his daughter (because of my time in Florida) he will never get to be the one to introduce me to them.
It screams for every moment that we have shared, and every moment that we will never share again. God damn it Jason I miss you…

My mind is screaming in pain because it can't fathom why he could ever do such a thing. How the hell could you do this? Someone of your intellect and your beliefs and you go and destroy the worlds of everyone that cares for you! You selfish jerk how the hell can you abandon your family, your daughter, your unborn son! The fact that you felt that the world was coming down on you and that everything was going wrong.. yeah I can understand that, I'm in the same spot… everything that I have been trying to accomplish has been tough, it certainly hasn't been a walk in the park, and while things are coming down around me and I look at what appears to be a dead end at every corner I still push forward. We all do! Life isn't easy for any of us and it's even harder for those of us that refuse to back down, so what the hell?! Take the easy way out? YOU SELFISH PRICK! My mind can't comprehend how you can do this because it makes no sense, you were the provider! You were the one that was taking care of your family! You helped them accrue the debt that you were working at paying off and then you just abandon them??! Leave them in a position in which they are now buried under the weight of the world that you were building for them only to rip out the main support beams before it was finished!

You also robbed your sister of her happiness! She just got married two days before you decided to do this! THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING? You got a wedding, you got a honeymoon, you got to have the happiness that you so longed for all of your life, and the moment your sister finally gets the same kind of happiness you steal it from her! You just swoop in and destroy it! You thought this was the easy solution, you thought this was the way that everything would be alright… everyone you left behind that was counting on you will have the hardest times of their lives! You never thought of that! You never thought of what the consequences were to those that you leave behind and for that you hurt us in a way that you can't imagine. I love you Jason, but there is no way I can respect this choice… I've never had reason to be angry with you before but I can't let this go… and my anger may never die because you took the easy way out and made such a cold hearted self absorbed choice.

I don't know what to do… I don't know what to think… my mind is pissed at him and my heart is crying for him, and those emotions are so conflicting that my body is locked. My mind won't let me cry for him, and my heart won't let me curse the choices he has made. I don't know what to do…. I feel more statuesque as I think it over my emotions are almost encased in granite.

Because of this my dreams are getting more painful. While my dad had tried to tell me that it's just a dream and that I shouldn't allow it to affect me but also don't tend to second guess what I see. I haven't dreamt of my grandfather in many years. The last dream I had of him was shortly after his death. In that dream he was relaxed. He looked younger than I ever knew him, he looked like he did in pictures that I had seen of him growing up, long before I was born, long before my father was born. This new dream was different. In this dream he was the man I remember when I did something that he wasn't happy with. He was a very strong man, someone that had a presence that people didn't challenge. When I made mistakes and he corrected me it instilled fear and later respect. In this dream he was angry with me. He was correcting me again… reminding me that Jason... no matter what he has done... is still family. You don't EVER turn your back to, or your heart away from, family. I keep wondering if this was because my mind was getting too aggressive over the way I felt and something needed to keep me from shutting down. Either way he didn't like the fact that I was more pissed at Jason than sad. The fact that I haven't cried (and I still haven't) over the loss of his life, over the situation that his wife is now going to be in, and the torment that my Aunt and Uncle are now experiencing is the source of why he is angry at me. I have a feeling that this is going to take a long time for me to resolve… it's not like anything else I have ever experienced, it's not supposed to be like this….

"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal." – A Tombstone in Ireland

Computer Killer

Geek, Nerd, Techno-geek, Computer-freak, yeah I've been called just about everything that you can think of when it comes to computers. I've spent years studying them, building them and ripping them apart only to rebuild them and make them better. At the same time I am also someone who most people turn to when their computer is on the fritz. I can understand how a computer can be one of the most frustrating things to deal with, and recently I have had an experience that I had never had previously on any computer. Fortunately & unfortunately it happened on my home computer. I say fortunately because I would rather this happen to my system and experience the problem first hand than to have it happen to a friend and have no idea how or what they might have done to cause the issue.
A couple weeks ago I had an issue with my computer, I was logging into the computer remotely so I could access my programs from work (I told you that I was a geek when it came to computers). I noticed that my recycle bin was showing that it had trash in it. Now I am usually one of those people that when I delete a file, if I don't delete the file directly, I immediately empty the recycle bin. So for me to see files in the recycle bin is kind of unusual, so I thought maybe I got distracted and forgot to empty it. I decided to open the bin and see what it is that I forgot to delete. When I opened the bin it was empty. The icon showed it being full and the bin was empty. Now this isn't all that surprising. Windows is know for having strange quirks and seeing a malfunctioning icon is nothing new for me. I've seen that a dozen or so times and there is usually a really quick fix for this issue. Delete a file and empty the bin will take care of it 98% of the time.
So I created a quick junk file, a simple txt file that I planned to immediately delete. So I trashed it as soon as I made it and followed my usual procedure of emptying the recycle bin. I got the usual "Are you sure you want to delete the items in the bin" and I clicked yes only to get a response "Error: Not all files could be deleted." I opened the recycle bin and the junk file was gone and there was nothing in the bin, but the icon still showed a full recycle bin.
Well that seemed annoying, so I decided to do what any good tech would do and "restart the computer". A few minutes later the computer is back up and running... and the recycle bin is still full. I check the bin and it shows nothing. So I decide to do the next trick and try to empty the empty recycle bin.... this time the message says "Are you sure you want to delete Windows?"
Ok so this is an interesting question, do I want to delete windows? Well considering the frustration that it has caused me over the years I went for the immediate response of "yes". I clicked on Yes knowing that there wasn't going to be any way that this system would allow me to physically remove windows. And I immediately got an error that says that it couldn't delete windows, files were in use etc. With some comfort of knowing that the computer was smart enough not to delete the operating system while it was running I knew things couldn't be too bad.
After about a day of research I found out that this is a bug that randomly occurs in windows and that Microsoft is well aware of it but has no intention of ever trying to find a fix for it.
I tried a number of options to correct the problem, searching through forum after forum of other people having the same problem and what they did to try to resolve the issue. After about 2 days the problem was solved.... but not before I discovered another issue. One of the things that I thought about doing to resolve the issue is to use Microsofts "Restore System" function. This can be quite the life saver. If you have never used it, here is how it works: Windows saves a snapshot of your computer (usually on a daily basis) it saves a quick image of what the computer was running and what the registry looked like on a specific day. Now the idea is to look at just the programs that are installed and the registry. It does not look at files that are saved or emails that are downloaded. So when you use the restore it ignores everything except the program changes. So if you install a program that has an issue with your computer you can restore the computer to the way it was the day before without losing your email or any new things that you may have downloaded. It simply pretends that it never installed the software and removes all knowledge of the software from the registry and its installation folder. This can save you a lot of time if you have a problem with the computer. So where was my issue that I discovered before resolving my recycling bin problem?
All of my restore points were gone. This was an issue. I looked at the system and it was set to save restore points everyday, and there were no restore points to be found. This is could be a major issue. Without those restore points I can't restore the system to a previously working state. So here I am wondering what I am going to do if I can't get it working?
So I am now surfing through even more forums trying to find where this problem comes from, the only info that I could uncover on this problem is that windows does this if you are running low on hard drive space.
This is the part of the blog where you need to know that I was laughing about "lack of hard drive space". Anyone that knows me knows that I have more space on my computer than most people will have in the next 5 years. When people were talking about how they had 1 gig of hard drive space in 1996 I had 2 gigs. When people were telling everyone about how they had 10 gigs of hard drive space in 1999 I had a 40 gig drive. Here we are in 2008, and people are talking about how their computers are coming with 500 gig drives.... I have just over 2 Terabytes (2000 gigs). Yeah it seems like a lot but for what I am doing with my computer you'll realize that in the next 5 - 10 years I'll have a petabyte (1000 Terabytes) just to support the kind of animation that I want to be making, and backing up all of my previous work. Needless to say I have plenty of hard drive space so for my computer to be doing something that is usually only done when there is no hard drive space that means that there is a problem with windows.
So as I said, I managed to fix the recycling bin problem, and I didn't want to panic over the inability of restoring my system should a major issue occur. So I took this time to start backing up my system. I spent the next 4 days backing up as much of my system as I could onto my external hard drive.
After I had backed up most of the hard drive I noticed one other strange occurrence my image files wouldn't open using windows picture viewer. They would open fine using my image editing software (Photoshop) but the problem with that was it takes nearly 1 minute to get Photoshop started and if someone sends me a picture that I want to look at quickly I want to just use the windows software because it will open the image in a matter of seconds and then I can close it. A day later, the recycling bin error returned.
Well, with all of this happening I made the decision that I need to reinstall windows. I decided that windows had become corrupt and without being able to restore to a good state, it seemed only logical that I wipe out my hard drive, reinstall my software, and have a fully functional version of everything running.
The weekend hit and I spent 2 days reformatting and reinstalling, I had most of it taken care of by the end of Saturday and on early Sunday morning I realize exactly how bad my situation had become. The wipe of the hard drive was a good thing, a fresh install of windows is something I usually do once a year but this was something that I had done only about 6 months earlier.
So if the reinstall was a good thing why was my situation bad? I realized that it was bad as soon as I plugged in my backup drive. The computer identified it immediately and I was able to browse the files. Everything that was on the drive seemed to be there. The only problem is that everything that I had backed up from the previous install of windows had become corrupt. Apparently the corruption of windows was passed onto all of the files that I had been storing on the same drive as windows. It wrote all of the files in an undecipherable format that only the corrupted version of windows could read.
I spent the next 3 days attempting to recover my files only to find that they were gone. Hundreds of pictures gone... audio files that I was editing for my next film....gone.... months worth of work all history because windows destroyed the files. Nothing could decipher the corruption and what made it worse is that the corruption was tying itself to my hard drive. It wouldn't allow me to delete any of the files, so it was eating up hundreds of gigs of space and preventing me from being able to delete the files.
So I spent 2 more days copying the good files that I still had access to which had never been on the corrupt drive. And finally I had to run another program that would forcibly and permanently wipe out the drive.
So here I am a couple weeks later, still trying to see what was recoverable. I'm glad that I make multiple copies of my important files, but I kick myself for not having been able to catch this issue earlier.
There is a lot that I can never recover, but if anything I hope this serves as a warning to all that a simple backup is not always the only answer. From this point forward if I ever notice corruption in windows and I still have network access I will be transferring the files to another working computer first to make sure that the files are truly backed up before I wipe it out.

Wonder-Con

A week ago I went out to San Francisco because my film was running in the San Francisco International Children's Festival at Wonder-Con. I have to admit that I had some interesting expectations for this festival but it was so much more than I could have anticipated.
What I didn't know was that the gamers conference was being held a few days before Wonder-con and the two fests overlapped on Friday. It was quite the experience.
Thursday night - I arrived in San Francisco at about 8:15pm after flying from Florida to Atlanta and when we were held up in Atlanta for about 30 minutes. So I arrived a little later than I expected I would. While I was headed there I struck up a conversation with the guy that was sitting next to me from the Atlanta leg of the flight. He told me about how the company he was working for was sending him to Atlanta a few times a year, and this was the first of many trips. We also talked for a while about the film industry and how I was on my way out to a festival. So over a couple hours we got to know each other and had a lot to talk about. As we landed he told me that he lived pretty close to the hotel I was staying at and since his girlfriend was picking him up at the airport he offered to drop me off. I was really appreciative and offered him a couple of my extra tickets to Wonder-con.
Well so far the trip was going good, the hotel was right in the middle of the city, really close to the Moscone where the Con was happening. Everything we could possibly need was right there. So after checking into the The Maxwell Hotel and getting into the room (it was on the 12th floor, and the view of the city was pretty nice) I took a stroll down Geary st to a local pizza / sub shop and got dinner. As I was walking out the door of the shop I knew I could get in a lot of trouble if I wasn't careful.
A girl walking by the shop immediately stopped and began acting far more friendly than most people do. She acted as though she knew me from somewhere else and even said "I remember you, we met earlier" and I told her that she was mistaken. So after about 5 minutes of her trying to get me to either buy her dinner or "walk her home" as she was kind enough to put it, she realized that I wasn't about to be taken and tried to find someone else that she "recognized". So I high tailed it back to the hotel dinner and money still in my possession.
Friday was interesting as it was the first day of the Festival and the Con, Ari and both knew that we should check in that day but we didn't have much intention of hanging around there since our films wouldn't run until Saturday. We explored San Fran for a couple hours, and then headed out to the Moscone where we met up with some guys that Ari knew would be at the game conference. So after we met up and had lunch, we went to the Moscone South and got our passes to get into the Con.

Friday @ The Con -
We had some difficulty getting the passes, it seems that one of the guys that was working for the Festival had picked up all of the passes and we didn't have his phone number to find him. After talking with the registration people one of the ladies took pity on us and made a couple professional passes for us to get in and find out where we were supposed to be for the film fest.
As we explored the lower level of the main floor we found a bunch of the booths where a lot of various companies were that we were familiar with. While I needed to check out the View Askew booth (and buy up a bunch of the stuff that they usually only sell on the website) Ari needed to check out the SLG Publishing booth (they were right next to each other so that made things easy). We each picked up a bunch of things that we wanted and decided that anything we would acquire at this con we should do on the first day so we don't bog ourselves down on the days that were more important.
After doing some more exploration of the main floor we came across an area where there were various people signing comic books and a I noticed a familiar face... I can't say that I had ever met him before but I remembered seeing him a number of times in various documentaries about Star Wars. As I got closer I realized that I was standing before Peter Mayhew who played Chewbacca in all of the Star Wars movies. Now those that know about my past know that all through out high school and college I was a star wars geek. Before the movies were re-released I was still coveting a prized collection of about 20 figures and when people had questions (or wanted to make me look like even more of a geek in front of other people by trying to stump me) they would ask anything they could think of about Star Wars. Fortunately for me I have been in many various industries that have gotten me accustomed to having the opportunity to meet celebrities. I learned many years ago not to freak out or go all "fan-boy" on anyone of pop culture status. So when I approached Mr. Mayhew I simply shook his hand and told him that I appreciate his work. I watched a number of other people freak out and while he was courteous with them I could see that he was used to this kind of a reaction and knew it was best to be polite and eventually they would either stop of move on to the next celebrity that they could freak out over. So while they got a smile and a hand shake, he actually talked with me for a while. When I told him that I was running a film in the children's festival he even took out his copy of the Wonder Con book to try and look up my film so he could see what it was about. I think it was probably one of the most positive experiences that I have had in quite a while getting to meet someone that I grew up watching on many different occasions in what was once my favorite movie series of all time.
Afterwards I got a call from the director of the film festival and he wanted to tell me that there was a booth for the fest on the floor and he told me where the films were playing. So Ari and I decided to find the booth and put some of our promotional materials out. We also decided that it might behoove us to work the booth for a couple hours in between the showing of our films on Saturday.
We made our way to the area where the films were being shown and then we realized how much time had gone by so after becoming slightly familiar with where we would be spending the next day we made our way back to the hotel to meet up with a friend.
After having a drink and just relaxing at the bar & grill adjacent to the hotel with our friend we got a call from Jenny and Dan, two other directors that we met at the Los Angeles Film Fest. We gave them directions to the hotel and agreed to meet up for dinner and drinks at 7 which gave them a couple hours to get settled and find their way to the hotel.
So Dan and Jenny met up with us and we went to a place called the Sushi boat which was across from the hotel, to follow it up by going to Lefty O'Douls Pub down the road. After a few hours of drinking and laughing and just having fun we decided to call it a night at about 1am. Being that I was still functioning on east coast time it was about 4am for me and while I would try to "sleep in" the next day I would still wake up at 5:30... and then struggle to stay in bed until 8.

Saturday @ Wonder-con
Saturday would be just as busy as Friday. Getting up at 8 so we could get to a cafe down the road in the morning and meet up with another animator that we had been in touch with since watching his film at various festivals. We didn't get much time to hang out as he had to get to work, but it was cool having the opportunity to meet up for a few minutes.
After breakfast we headed straight to the Moscone and got to the booth to make sure that our promotional materials were in check. We talked with a couple people about the films and told a few people with kids to check it out. 10 minutes later I was in the auditorium watching the films during the block in which my film was playing. My film was the last to show and I was getting slightly discouraged as the two films prior to mine were both documentaries that lasted 10 minutes long each. I could see the kids getting restless and parents started leading them out of the theater before the second one ended. Suddenly with about 3 minutes remaining for the film before mine would end I noticed that what was a 2/3 full theater was now 1/4 full. A lot of people had left and it was looking pretty sparse. I didn't know what to think at this point and I figured that this would be tough because the place was mostly empty.
As my film started the place was just about as barren as I would see it....... and then it happened. As soon as the slash screen for my little picture company cleared off of the screen, and the first couple seconds of the film began I noticed that just about every kid that left the theater was still near the door outside, and all of the kids that were waiting for the next show were also there and they all seemed to spot that a cartoon was playing. Suddenly the theater filled in quicker than I could have ever imagined. I could hear them laughing, and while I have been told by hundreds of adults that that they like my film about "bears" the kids were saying "Look! Dogs!"... the kids get it! That was the greatest feeling to hear them talking about it. This is the whole reason to do what I do. Hearing the reactions of the kids, the kids that I made this film for, made the whole trip worth it.
After wards we had the Q&A and when I got up to talk with about the film the kids were still in the crowd and one of them was saying, "I want to ask a question" to his mother, but didn't know what to ask. Then Ari came to the rescue by whispering "Ask him how long it took to make." After that question came a flood of other questions from the kids "How many dogs do you have?", "Do they really act like that?" etc. It was the most interaction that I have had in a Q&A ever, it was great.
Afterwards, we went back to the booth to continue promoting the film fest. When we got there, almost all of the cards that we had put down were gone. I came with over 250 post cards promoting the film and I was nearly out. After and hour or two of promoting the fest I decided to explore the Con a little more. I managed to get around and see a lot of different people dressed as various characters. It was interesting to see how many people were dressed up in Star Wars costumes, one guy even had a working life size R2-D2 he even gave a seminar on how to make your own.
As I continued to wander around I saw a number of other celebrities that were around David Duchovney and Jillian Anderson were there to promote the new X-Files movie, Jon Favreau was there talking about Iron Man. I made my way back to the booth and Ari and I met up with Jenny and Dan again, we decided to get lunch and then headed back to the convention, and as we were walking back we met up with Serena Valentino the author of "Nighmares & Fairy Tales" and "Gloom Cookie". She was really nice to talk with, and it was cool to just hang out with her for a little while. After getting together with her we ran back to the theater for Ari's showing of his film. The showing ran a little long as they decided to put 3 films in that were 22 minutes each, and then they put Ari's film in last. After the film ran the Q&A went really well, a lot of people asked about his film and what he is working on next. Once we finished with the Q&A we met up with Dan (the director of the fest) and he told us to head over to the Thirsty Bear for an after party. We hung out there for a few hours talking with a number of other directors and just had a good time. It would be around 1am when we would get in, and being that Ari's flight out would be at 6:30 we would have to leave the hotel by 4am to go to the Airport. My flight wasn't until 7:50.

Sunday - The airport
We made it out of the Hotel at 4am and had to call a cab because none of the other transports were running at that time on Sunday. Apparently they run that early most days with Sunday being the exception. We got to the airport with plenty of time to check in on the flight. Ari got to his gate and we grabbed a drink and relaxed while waiting for him to be able to board. His flight was soon ready and he was on his way back to Minnesota. I headed to my terminal and waited. Making some calls to people back home knowing that it was now 10 - 11am there it was safe to know I wouldn't be waking anyone up. As the time got closer, my gate changed to a few gates down, so I moved there, and found that things were not going to have an easy flight out. The readout on the flight plan started showing Memphis then Atlanta. As it turned out the winds in San Fran were much higher than they would normally be, so they said they needed to lighten the plane to make it easier to transport. So instead of cutting the number of passengers they decided it would be better to reduce the amount of fuel and then land some where else to refuel and continue. At 7:30 we were on board the plane preparing to go to Memphis and then on to Atlanta.... at 8:30 they were telling us that we were still to heavy and that we would be now landing in Kansas City. By 9:30 they were telling us that we were still too heavy and that we were still landing in Kansas City.... by 11am they told us that we were still too heavy and that we would be landing in Denver Colorado. After sitting on the tarmac for 3 hours (with a child 2 rows behind me that was screaming her lungs out) we finally took off, before we took off I called Delta and rearranged my connecting flight. Because I knew that I would never make it to Atlanta on time to catch my regular flight. We landed in Denver and then after refueling about 1 hour later we were able to take off again (the kid continued to scream the entire flight... 6 hours of flying 4 hours total on the tarmac... 10 hours of non stop screaming, I was happy to get off that flight). We arrived in Atlanta around 7:30 eastern time, I ran to my next gate which was almost done boarding and expecting to leave at 7:45pm. 20 people from my flight showed up on my heels and they each tried to change their tickets from the previous flight. I handed them my ticket and they told me that I had a ticket waiting for me (good thing I knew to call ahead). There were about 4 seats on the flight and I got one. I was back in Florida 2 1/2 hours later. I got back to my apartment at midnight, and passed out right away.

While I wasn't happy to be waking up for my Monday morning meeting at work, I can say that this trip was definitely worth every minute. In fact I have already put in for my time off for Comic-Con. I don't know what to expect out of Comic-Con but I can say that Wonder-Con brought in roughly 20,000 - 25,000 people on that weekend... Comic-Con is expected to average 120,000+ people.... this is going to be great!

Perspective

Its been months since I sat to write in any of my blogs. Its not that I haven't had anything to say its that I have been in need of a change. I needed to recompile my thoughts because I realize that a lot of my blogs are becoming more about me ranting about things that I find to be obnoxious, disturbing, frustrating, or just just plain wrong. There are too many blogs out there with people who are spending their time whining about anything and everything.... so this is going to be a different type of blog.
I want to write today about something other than the frustrations of the things that hit me on a daily basis. Today I want to talk about success. Yes, success... everyone defines technically the same, but the real question of sucess is based upon degree. For example. I've been working out for months now. I decided one day that I wanted to change my life and that I knew that if I didn't I would be headed in a bad direction. It wasn't long after I got into my position as network admin that I knew I would need to have have something to break up the monotony of my job. I didn't want to be that guy that took the job and sat in his office all day long and didn't do anything. Fortuneately I am not that guy... while I may be in my office all the time I am never without enough to keep me busy. Once I got out of work I would find myself going home and doing the same thing sitting in front of a computer and trying to get things accomplished, whether it be finding different forms of entertainment to get my creativity flowing or trying to control the ideas that I have for my current film project and get them put into a form that I can be constructive with the direction of the film.
So to break these activities up I signed up for a gym. I figure if I could work for 8 hours then work out for an hour for at least 4 days a week it would give me a positive change.
Well the change has been positive for the most part.... positive in the form of losing almost 30lbs. So this change has been a success for me. Am I at my goal yet now that I have gotten my alternating routine in place? Not even close. But the little changes that I have had happen are the first step of success. When I started I was able to drop 5lbs a week without even thinking about it. It happened that way for a few weeks and then it slowed down. This was expected as the body tends to adapt to the changes you make, and therefore you need to keep changing to prevent it from getting comfortable with what you are doing and plateauing. So for a while there were a number of weeks where I would drop only 1 lb others when I might only drop 1/2 lb. Its not a great feeling to see that no matter how hard I worked out my body compensated for some of it and made it more difficult to reach the same peak I reached the week prior.
I thought about how most people would respond to these results. I remember seeing people in the same position that I am in saying things like "I have to get strickter, I ONLY lost 1 lb this week."..... "I can't belive I ONLY lost a 1/2 lb this week, I worked so hard and it didn't pay off."....."I'm not getting the results I want and I am working out so hard, I ONLY lost....".
I decided when I began this process that there would be no "I ONLY'S" in my vocabulary. As long as I didn't gain weight then I would celebrate the week as victory.... and I have! No matter how minor the change I talk myself up as though it was the biggest loss in the world, and I plan to keep doing so because it means that the next week will be different.
So how has it worked? Great! I know that can honestly say that I started this regiment during one of the hardest times of the year and I am one of the only people that can say that I ate really well during Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years and during each of those weeks I still lost weight. I had actually told myself that if I gained during any of those weeks I wouldn't beat myself up about it, I would simply go back to everything I was doing. I didn't exactly stay perfect during any of those weeks but I made sure that I would continue to hit the gym and push as hard as I can and stick to the path that I began a while back.
So even minor things can be a success....

My film that I finished last March has been touring around the world as most who know me have heard. It has been in over 20 film festivals and I have been able to attend only a small number of those fests, but the ones that I have been to have been a lot of fun! I haven't been able to apply for all of the festivals that I would have liked to be part of but I am happy to have been able to get into those that I was accepted to. The best part is that with all of the fests that I have applied for I managed to get accepted to about half of them. I have also gotten my fair share of rejections. The thing that I have a hard time looking past is that there are those who look at my film and they compare it quality wise to films that have 5 - 6 people helping them, or budgeted films and shoot it down. I even had one company write to me and say, "We received many good films, and we're sorry but but yours will not be shown at the festival: Reason: The story is poor even by short standards, and the ending makes no sense." I kept this response and I look at it everytime I get accepted into another festival. While I was awestruck when I got it, I have to say that I was laughing the second time I read it and I realized that the person that wrote it was not in my target audience.
I have to admit that last week I wanted to write back to this festival and let them know that I appreciate their input and they have helped me tremendously but not in the way they expected, oh, and if they want to give my film a second chance, they can watch it at ComicCon this year in San Diego. Sometimes the best revenge is just to do well with what you have, and what I have is a film that one of the largest Comic Book / Entertainment / Movie Conventions in the world wants to show.
I suppose life can be pretty funny sometimes.... it all depends on your perspective.